Parental Rights

I just finished reading "War on Moms." That book was quite the eye opener. I do complain a lot about my child-focused organization's lack of real parental policy, but compared to other companies or organizations, I realize I am lucky to have any rights at all. I'n not going to compare the US to Europe or Canada -or Kenya, or any other other country with actual parental leave, for that matter- because that would not help at all. Ok, just because it needs to be said, Sweden offers parents 3 years off that parents can split any way they want. THREE years to be with their children, after which school is free. That's when I start crying.

The US has very poor parental policies. Paid time off after delivery is usually not universal, and adopting parents often are discriminated against -because they don't need to physically recover. Bonding time with children is not at all facilitated. New moms pretty much have a choice: go back to work full time or quit altogether. It's so rare to find part-time or shared work with good benefits. To add to that, daycare is super expensive.

So on one hand, I am grateful to work in an organization that gives moms partially paid time off after delivery/adoption, but on the other, I am still very frustrated at the lack of compromise companies are willing to make to accommodate new parents. Look around you. How many parents do you know wish they could work part time but don't have that option? I'm sure that would be quite a few.

Ok, that post doesn't really have a conclusion. It was more of a rant. Now I'm going to read some fiction that is not going to make my blood boil!

I Got a Feeling...

That the baby will be a girl. I would be super happy with either. I just feel it's going to be a girl.
I have about 15 names for girls and hmmm, 3 for boys. I'm going to have to massively brainstorm if we have a boy!

Are you now stuck with the Black Eyed Peas song in mind? You're welcome!

Ubuntu Turned Inward

When this blog started a few years ago, I wanted to write about humanitarian issues and how we have to get off our butts and do something to equalize revenue and power in the world. With time, my posts have moved away from this goal and have been more and more about me. With this pregnancy, I feel that this trend is not going to get much better.

I find myself pretty torn these days. I am still interested in what is happening in the world, of course, and really want to be part of the solution. Right now however, my whole focus is on the little one growing inside my belly and I find it very difficult to be energized about anything else. I read books about motherhood in the US (those are depressing), read pregnancy magazines, and don't relate to anything else. Part of it is because it is difficult for me to imagine my life in the next few years apart from motherhood (job, studies, life in general), and part of it is simply because of what is happening to my body. I hope to be bored with pregnancy-related topics soon and regain interest in the world!

As of now, the Ubuntu philosophy ("I am because you are") rings true of this inward phase: all that I do is for another person whom I must nurture. It's a new experience for sure, one that i am enjoying immensely, but also one that makes me self-centered and a little boring. Please give me some grace in the next few months as this blog will probably be about the baby and me. Soon enough, I'll talk about other subjects.

On a somewhat related note, I noticed in the past that a lot of very pregnant women always touch and rub their tummies. I thought that was weird, but now I do it all the time -and I'm not even showing yet!

A New Life

One evening early August, Joe and I came back home from a delicious happy hour -the place is called Bottle House, in Madrona, and their wine/cheese combo is the cheapest and most delicious I have tasted. I thought that one glass of wine was nice, but come on now, another one at home (free!) would be an excellent idea. Just then the image of a baby inside a womb popped into my mind. Seriously! Needless to say, I was freaked out enough that I didn’t get that second glass of wine. Just because you never know. I didn’t think much about it until Joe was away on a weekend at his parents’ and I poured myself a glass of wine. The same image of an fetus came to me. Er… oookay, now that was spooky. So I took a pregnancy test (you know where I’m going with that story, don’t ya?) and sure enough, it was positive.

HOLY CRAP! You’re lucky I’m polite.

Joe and I were just thinking that this life without kid was awesome, that we could wait a few more long months to try to conceive as he would start school in the fall and I wanted to spend a month somewhere in the field. Ha. Haha. Hahaha. Guess who had other plans? MY BODY! So here we were, a few weeks later, expecting a baby.

I was quite ambivalent for the first couple of weeks. Once the shock had passed –no more wine, no more suchi, no more brie, no more spending a whole month in the field, thoughts of labor and stretch marks and no sleep, waaah- I felt elated about the sesame seed growing inside me. Weird how you go from reasoning to falling for someone you haven’t met yet but who suddenly means the world to you and whom you would do anything to protect.

And then the sesame seed started acting up. Nausea, exhaustion, more nausea. I mean, it was not that bad, but I’m a huge wuss, so feeling a little nauseous is really uncomfortable (what? Wait ‘til labor? Hahaha. Shut up). In the morning I didn’t have anything in my stomach and felt like throwing up, but then any kind of food disgusted me and I couldn’t eat anything, which upset my stomach even more. And then there were the headaches and the bloating. Aaah, Heaven. I wrote it all down so that one day I can prove to that screaming teenager that I suffered injustly, too, now go to your room and do your homework. Oh, the good thing is that I was so disgusted by food that I was not craving brie or wine or sushi. I seriously thought that I would not really handle the no drinking game very well, but it has been really easy. Well, my appetite is coming back now, and with it the sweet craving for wine. Oh well.

And of course, there is nothing like the prospect of gaining 30+ pounds to make you realize that, um, these past 8 months not working out are certainly not doing you any favors. So I started eating right and will start working out. Next week, my friend Jen and I (she’s also pregnant and due a month before me) will start yoga.

So that’s it. We’re super excited. I can’t wait to start feeling him/her move inside my belly. I can’t wait to see my belly grow. I can wait to see my butt grow, though. I can’t wait to start teaching him/her French cuss words. I kid, I kid. Kinda.

Here is the baby, at 12 weeks and 5 days (this morning). S/he is due mid-April. Let the countdown begin!